Saturday, January 3, 2009

on resolving my resolution

On the 3rd day of last year – exactly one year ago today - I wrote a blog called ‘On Resolution.’

I don’t think of resolutions as things that are concrete or things that will give me reason to deem myself a failure if left undone. I don’t believe in social trends that come and go (not to say that I have never bought into them myself), and I don’t think all of life’s problems can be solved by losing weight or changing your fashion sense. I also don’t think, as my best friend does, that people who set resolutions are morons (I laughed out loud when I read that, but only because I love you so much my Natalie).

I do think it’s important to set goals, however, even if those goals end up changing, or turning out to be not-so-important in the long run. On this note, here is 2008:

~

Be more socially active instead of asleep. Read articles. Learn geography. Challenge yourself to be involved in the world any way you can, even if it's uncomfortable. Check. Thanks to a geography quizzing website, I am now knowledgeable about many areas I was clueless about before… Eastern Europe, Asia, Oceania, and all those random countries in Africa that actually do exist. If you feel so inspired: www.lizardpoint.com/fun/geoquiz/. Getting involved can weigh heavily on your heart, especially when you begin to learn about concentrated wealth and how very easy it would be so solve third world issues if the wealthy of the world thought as one.

Strive to be more organized. Who knew that Dayna would turn into an anal-retentive, not-always-fun-to-be-around roommate who flips out when she occasionally has to do dishes or step in a plate of chicken. Check; but I may have taken it too far (Thanks to Adrienne and Senja for always putting up with my weirdness and my newfound love of bleach and Windex).

Begin to collect ideas for a book. Compile them in a notebook labeled 'Memoirs of a Life Deliberately Lived.' Then try to promote consistency by living deliberately. Sort of a check, I collected ideas for a book, didn’t label them though, I felt like my life is too outrageously spontaneous and random to fit into one title. I sort of lived deliberately…

Intentionally befriend people who defy social norms. One or two checks. No names though.

Frequent pawn shops and garage sales, and start collecting records. Organize them by artist, color, genre, or date released. This will perhaps help with the enjoyment of the organization. Upon rediscovering the typical ‘starving college student lifestyle,’ and paying for meals in quarters on occasion, this aspiration was promptly discarded.

Begin to read more foreign authors. Search for perspectives you may not have experienced before. Soak in the themes and even if they seem too complicated, try to get what you can from them. No checks here, though I did really enjoy some poems by Spanish-speaking authors, particularly ‘Bajo un Palmar’ by Pedro Flores Córdova.

Play guitar with a homeless person.< Check. Summer 2008, Seattle.

Dwell in scripture; not in the amount read or the pages you turn in a day, but in the content of the message, and the weight of the words. Do not underline what is read, in case someone else might notice. Try to let it rest in your heart. Nope.

Everything is going to be fine. Work on realizing this when in a bind or having a rough day. I would like to say I have discovered the secret of not being stressed out or turning into an occasional basket case, but as of a few weeks ago, while trying to move and find a way over the pass, while working 30 hours a week and studying for finals… and subsequently wanting to end my life, I am okay with not checking this one.

Attempt to understand the subtle nuances between coffee blends. Also, and probably more socially helpful, wine. It would be nice to learn more about wine; goes nicely with cheese. No checks, and no newfound knowledge about coffee (except that really cheap, pre-ground coffee from Winco starts to sound really good after paying for Starbucks drinks in quarters). I do, however, still claim that wine goes nicely with cheese. A few new favorite wines of the past year: Zen of Zin, Big Red Monster, Lo Tengo, Martinsancho Verdejo, Prosperity Merlot, and 3 Blind Moose. Most are affordable occasionally for the average college student.

Learn how to photograph professionally. Not just take pictures, but to capture the essence of someone's heart in a frame. I would especially like more pictures of inanimate objects, sunsets, and facial expressions. Perhaps this is not the most pressing issue in my life.

Give more. Whether that means around the house I live in, my family, financially, or the giving of my time to organizations that need it. Could’ve done better.

Listen more. Talk less. I have heard (from Shani) that I am getting better at this. I definitely still have a long way to go, but I have made some headway.

Write as often as inspiration strikes; a sunrise, an open door, a brightly painted windowpane... create, be moved, help to move others, be inspired and open. I wrote a lot this year, and am proud of most of it.

Get at least another semester of school done. If financially possible, finish your AA. I think this was my favorite thing to finish this year… I managed to get a 3.0 GPA, which could have been higher, but I am just content to be back in school and chasing after what I want to do in life.

Reach the intermediete level of the Italian language. Spanish is great, and when you begin to struggle with the nuances of a different tongue, try to realize the benefits you will reap when you can carry on a meaningful conversation with millions more people than you could have before.< Upon getting back into school, I did, in fact, decide that pursuing fluency in Spanish was more important and useful to me than Italian right now. I would love to learn it someday, it is such a beautiful language, but I decided that I have my lingual hands full for now.

Think of something more creative than stickers and pictures to send to my 3 sponsored kids. They are in need, and they deserve the best. Poor kids.

Write a song of thanks and gratitude for someone else and the impact they have had on your life. I did start writing one for Popo, my grandpa, if that counts. And I sang my mom the song I wrote her two years ago for Mother’s Day…

Host a Compassion Day at church. There’s always next year.

Make amends with people you have wronged in your past. Whether that is asking forgiveness or letting them know you care. I wasn’t stellar in this area.

Live with purpose and stand for things that need defending: children with empty bellies, families with no roof over their heads, stories that need to be told, and hearts that need friends.< I genuinely, honestly, feel like I am doing this. Finally! The entire focus of my education right now is learning about the international community, and what will come of that eventually will hopefully be a career that I can actually help people with… not help people that just want to make more money… not help the people that don’t need it… not putting more money in the pockets of the world’s wealthy… not working for a self-serving company… but finding solutions to get a step closer to eradicating poverty, getting water to villages in Africa, pushing for peace over violence, and most of all trying to make sure that we as a generation did the best we could with what we were given.

Live intentionally. Love more and more unconditionally. I believe this phrase will always need working on, and it’s a lifelong pursuit. For all of us.

Welcome 2008. I think we will get along just fine.< For the most part, I think we did. On to the next adventure…

1 comment:

Vagamundo said...

Good Lord woman!! you sure pack a lot of goals in a little year...
I´m making just one big promise:
Survive.